The Story of Corruption in Malaysia. Part II: When You Play, You Pay.

See part 1 here.

The 'money to be my friend' scheme was so successful that the Malaysian Government got a tad bit over-zealous in friend hunting. Of course, they found no shortage of candidates clamoring for their good graces.

 

 As it usually happens with these types of relationships, 'favorites' tends to pop up.

 

Alot of people ended up with broken hearts, jilted by the Malaysian Government.

 But Malaysians ain't no depressed mopers! Hell no! They're people of action! If there's a problem, they get off their ass and solve it!

And so begins the Malaysian people's long struggle against corruption and graft.

Continued in part 3.

The Story of Corruption in Malaysia. Part 1: It Takes Two to Tango.

Once upon a time, Malaysia was a peaceful land of law and order. The people weren't bitchy, the government wasn't putrid, and nobody had incestual sex. What? You didn't think this level of breakdown in rational thinking among the population was just because bubble tea became a staple beverage did you? Come visit  Malaysia during election season. It's like a country of grumpy, sexually frustrated rednecks.

Well, everything was fine and dandy until one day...

And so the first bribe ever changed hands. Twas a dark day indeed for Malaysia. The following night, somebody slept with his cousin. I'm not exactly sure who, but if he's ever reading this, know that you are a significant factor which initiated the degradation of a nation.

It quickly became obvious to others that certain people were getting benefits they don't have. I mean, the bribers and bribables weren't exactly discreet about it.

Meanwhile, on the other end of the corruption strata...

Wait... Was the iPhone invented back then? I'm not sure... I don't think I can remember how life was before the Apple Revolution.
Anyway, as you can imagine, the foulness began spilling out to the rest of the masses...

To be continued in Part 2.

One Day at the Theaters

I went down to the cinema yesterday to finally get my alone time with Iron Man 3. Turns out emotions are still riding high even though the elections are over.

Sometimes I wonder if Malaysians will ever realize that receiving a bribe is only the second half of the bribing process. Sure, sometimes a government employee will blatantly solicit compensations, but this is rarely so because it puts them at risk. Here's an idea. Just stop giving bribes.

Mystery of Altantuyaa. Part 3: The Oddest Mystery.

For part 1 click here.
For part 2 click here.

Disclaimer: All pictures except the poorly drawn comics are not owned by me and are hastily pulled off Google images. 

I am not sure if anyone else noticed this but...

Altantuyaa was a model. The phrase 'Mongolian Beauty' became almost synonymous with her after her death. Hence it bugs me to no end as to why of all the pictures of her available, the Malaysian media chose to honor her memory by favoring this picture-

-in all their publications about her. I'm not kidding. This image of her is blatantly displayed on blogs, newspapers, pamphlets, and billboards all over the country.

I may be wrong, but I would imagine her being someone who cares a great deal about her looks, being a model and all...

 

Yeah, we got to see what's probably worse for a model than an aged look. We saw her without her makeup on. Thanks Malaysia.

 source before ghost added:www.malaysiakini.com

And that folks, is the final mystery of her death. Unfulfilling, I know. Well, here are a few pictures of how she is meant to be remembered. I swear, if they had put these up on the billboards in the first place, people would probably be more worked up about finding her killers. Particularly the men.

And that's that. I'll grant you a Q&A session for sticking with my rants this long.

 

 

Google Adsense Woes

Google Adsense recently turned down my application to place ads on this blog upon the basis that there is not enough text on the blog. I realize that the problem was most of my text is in the images and their word parsers just doesn't do pictures. Still the whole rejection thing convinced me to browse through their terms and conditions at least once and I found another restriction they had listed. No excessive profanity they said.

It's hard to determine what Google deems excessive in the use of profanity, but I guess I understand where they're coming from. Readers might subconsciously associate the content of the blog with the advertisements displaying at the same time, and they don't want that. For example if this happened:

The result would be:

But suppose I fuse profanity with hilarity. Wouldn't that balance things out? It may even have a positive impact on the viewer. I don't know. I have this totally unjustified sense of cocksureness about my sense of humor. What do you think?

Mystery of Altantuya. Part 2: Demise and Surmise.

This is a continuation from part 1 here.

When we last saw of Abdul and Altantuyaa, they were in France and had just ended their relationship.

When Abdul got back to Malaysia, he ended up barricading himself in his house. 

Meanwhile, off the coast of Singapore, on board a Singaporean navy destroyer....

Back in Malaysia, there was a prolonged commotion outside Abdul's house. It lasted for a few days.

It is widely believed though never proven that Abdul called for backup.
 

I mean, it's not like all politicians have access to private death squads or anything. Unless Malaysia was more devious than I give it credit for...
 

Whether Abdul made the call or not, backup did arrive, in the form of 2 Malaysian Special Branch officers. Special Branch is Malaysia's attempt to create an agency in the form of a combination of the American FBI and CIA. Months later, during trial, they would testify that Altantuyaa begged for her life, claiming she was pregnant.

This is Malaysia indeed. After that, they stripped her naked, shot her again, strapped a block of C-4 onto her body, and blew her the fuck up. It took another few months for people to notice she was missing. The entire investigation and trial to find her killers went about something like this:

And it goes on....

And that's pretty much the extent of justice Altantuyaa was granted. Who was actually behind her gruesome murder? Speculations abound. Some say it was Abdul, some say his wife, some say it was the Vice Prime Minister who by 2013 elevated himself to the post of Prime Minister, some say it was the PM's wife. Hell, some even say it was the French.

And that ladies, gentlemen, and neither, is the first half of the Mystery of Altantuyaa. "Wait... there's more mystery to this other than who killed her?" you ask. Well of course there is! It'll come up in part 3.

An Altantuyaa Aftermath

As I was researching Altantuya on the web, I came across this article.

So team rocket got the idea to erect some billboards along a road the Prime Minister would be expected to drive through during his visit. All in the name of doing her justice of course.

 Well the billboards was torn down by the government soon after. Team rocket was pretty broken up about it.

Well, at first I was touched. But then I began to think. I know. I don't like to think either, but I had nothing to do at the moment. Anyway it suddenly clicked and I realized that this was such...

I wondered if Altantuyaa would have deserved such a billboard planting honor if she was not connected to the Prime Minister. If politics were involved in one's death, does that make them more deserving of justice? If another anonymous woman got hit by a truck and exploded into pieces, would team rocket setup billboards for them too?

But it is understandable I suppose. They can't go fighting for justice around every nook and cranny. Or can they?

 

Of course for that to happen, this would have to happen:

Yeah. That will probably get the signboards up. But seriously, it can't be denied that this little publicity stunt earned them massive points against their rivals, especially during election season. I do hope that team rocket gave thanks to the appropriate people for that success.

I mean, seriously. Are the billboards really just for the eyes of the Prime Minister? Couldn't they just send him a letter if that was the case. Would the PM even be watching the road? For all we know, his eyes might be closed while he sits in the back of his car getting a blow job.... or giving one... I don't know. I didn't care enough to research his preferences.

I think the billboards was actually for the people. For you and me if we were ever to drive down that road. We were the ones who were meant to see it. To be reminded of the dark history. To be inspired by the logo of the political party emblazoned on it's surface. To be at awe of their stance for justice for this woman. And finally of course, to instill in us the notion of the incompetence of their rival.

Now if only they could have cut the bullshit and told us that, we'd be much obliged.